I
一
Living is no laughing matter:
生活不是玩笑：
you must live with great seriousness
你必须严肃地活着，
like a squirrel, for example—
好比你是一只松鼠——
I mean without looking for something beyond and above living,
我说，生活是你的全部职业，
I mean living must be your whole occupation.
没什么是生活之上和生活之外。
Living is no laughing matter:
you must take it seriously,
生活不是玩笑：
so much so and to such a degree
你必须严肃地活着，
that, for example, your hands tied behind your back,
不论是：
your back to the wall,
你的双手被反绑，
or else in a laboratory
背靠着墙；
in your white coat and safety glasses,
或者在一个实验室里，
you can die for people—
穿着白大褂戴着眼镜；
even for people whose faces you’ve never seen,
你为别人而死，
even though you know living
甚至是陌生人，
is the most real, the most beautiful thing.
甚至当你知道生活是唯一真实、美丽的事。
I mean, you must take living so seriously
我说，你必须这么严肃地活，
that even at seventy, for example, you’ll plant olive trees—
甚至在七十岁，你也要种植橄榄树——
and not for your children, either,
并非为你的子孙
but because although you fear death you don’t believe it,
只因为你信仰的不是那让你恐惧的死亡，
because living, I mean, weighs heavier.
只因为，我说，生比死更重。
1947
1947
II
二
Let’s say we’re seriously ill, need surgery—
比如，你患了重病，需要手术
which is to say we might not get up
我们不能坐在一起了。
from the white table.
甚至知道，离开注定是悲伤。
Even though it’s impossible not to feel sad
我们还是说笑话，
about going a little too soon,
看窗外的雨，
we’ll still laugh at the jokes being told,
或者焦急的等候今天的报纸。
we’ll look out the window to see if it’s raining,
比如，我们在战场上，为了某种理想，
or still wait anxiously
在进攻的那天，
for the latest newscast. . .
我们会仰面倒下。
Let’s say we’re at the front—
在好奇和愤怒中，
for something worth fighting for, say.
但我们依然急切地等着战争的结果，即便是数十年。
There, in the first offensive, on that very day,
比如，五十岁时我们被投入监牢，
we might fall on our face, dead.
还有十八年的徒刑在面前。
We’ll know this with a curious anger,
我们依然活在外面，
but we’ll still worry ourselves to death
和那些人，动物，挣扎，风云一起活着，
about the outcome of the war, which could last years.
在高墙之外，或别处
Let’s say we’re in prison
我们必须活着，好像没有死亡。
and close to fifty,
and we have eighteen more years, say,
1948
before the iron doors will open.
We’ll still live with the outside,
三
with its people and animals, struggle and wind—
I mean with the outside beyond the walls.
这世界会变得很冷，
I mean, however and wherever we are,
只是群星中的最小一颗
we must live as if we will never die.
蓝丝绒间的一点霉迹——
真的，这就是我们伟大的地球。
1948
一天它变得如此寒冷，
不如一块冰峰，
III
也非垂死的云彩。
我们的地球是无限黑暗中，
This earth will grow cold,
随意被翻滚的核桃……
a star among stars
你必为这渺小而悲恸，必须悲伤才行——
and one of the smallest,
你要如此热爱这世界，才能说：“我曾活过”。
a gilded mote on blue velvet—
I mean this, our great earth.
1948.2
This earth will grow cold one day,
not like a block of ice
or a dead cloud even
but like an empty walnut it will roll along
in pitch-black space . . .
You must grieve for this right now
—you have to feel this sorrow now—
for the world must be loved this much
if you’re going to say “I lived”. . .
1948.2