I DON’T KNOW尼古拉·马兹洛夫

我不知道黄峪, 玛丽亚·托多罗娃 译


Distant are all the houses I am dreaming of,
遥远的是我梦想中的所有房子,
distant is the voice of my mother
遥远的是我母亲的声音
calling me for dinner, but I run toward the fields of wheat.
唤我吃晚饭,而我却奔向那麦田。

We are distant like a ball that misses the goal
我们遥遥相对就像一个错过目标的球
and goes toward the sky, we are alive
飞向天际,我们活着
like a thermometer that is precise only when
就像一个温度计它仅仅在我们看着它的时候
we look at it.
读数才准确。

The distant reality every day questions me
这遥远的现实每天都在和我对质
like an unknown traveler who wakes me up in the middle of the journey
就像一个陌生的旅客在途中把我叫醒
saying Is this the right bus?,
说“请问是这部车么?”
and I answer Yes, but I mean I don't know,
然后我回答“是的”,但其实我想说“我不知道”
I don't know the cities of your grandparents
我不知道你祖父母的城市
who want to leave behind all discovered diseases
他们希望离开那里发现的各种疾病
and cures made of patience.
还有以耐心开展的治疗方案。

I dream of a house on the hill of our longings,
我梦见在我们的欲望之山上有一所房子,
to watch how the waves of the sea draw
可以看见海浪怎样描画
the cardiogram of our falls and loves,
一幅心电图关于我们的失落和爱情,
how people believe so as not to sink
看见人们如何相信以免于沉落
and step so as not to be forgotten.
迈步以免于被忘却。

Distant are all the huts where we hid from the storm
遥远的是保护我们免于风暴袭击的那些小屋
and from the pain of the does dying in front of the eyes of the hunters
在里面我们免于体验母鹿死亡的疼痛 她们死在那些猎人的眼前
who were more lonely than hungry.
他们寂寞 但并不饥饿。

The distant moment every day asks me
这遥远的时刻每天都问我
Is this the window? Is this the life? and I say
“这是窗户么?”“这是生活么?”我说
Yes, but I mean I don't know, I don't know if
“是的”,但其实我想说“我不知道”,我不知道
birds will begin to speak, without uttering A sky.
鸟儿是否会开始说话,而不提到“天空”。


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