我的母马，当她发情时，

My mare, when she was in heat,

会在栅栏上行驶几个小时，

would travel the fenceline for hours,

背负着不耐烦

wearing the impatience

用她的蹄子击穿地面。

in her feet into the ground.

我向她保证，不是几英里外的种马，

Not a stallion for miles, I’d assure her,

这才罢休。

give it up.

她会张大鼻孔，

She’d widen her nostrils,

过滤着风寻找信息，然后再动，

sieve the wind for news, be moving again,

她的下腹部因汗水而变黑，

her underbelly darkening with sweat,

然后在门口停一下，等一下

then stop at the gate a moment, wait

观察我预想做的事情。

to see what I might do.

哦，我知道

Oh, I knew

对她来说这样子，很容易

how it was for her, easily

在那种广泛的欲望中认出自己：

recognized myself in that wide lust:

来到牧场

came to stand in the pasture

只是为了看它表现。

just to see it played.

伸出一只手，一桶谷物——

Offered a hand, a bucket of grain—

一分钟后她就从激情中分心，出神

a minute’s distraction from passion

因我的给予。

the most I gave.

然后她会回到烧伤她的地方：

Then she’d return to what burned her:

栅栏，栅栏，

the fence, the fence,

所以我期待，如果可能，让她自由

so hoping I might see, might let her free.

我羡慕她

I’d envy her then,

如此焦躁地透支

to be so restlessly sure

热量，渴望，以及需求

of heat, and need, and what it takes

以满足我们的需求——

to feed the wanting that we are—

只有一个缺口可以打开

only a gap to open

母马的辽阔，

the width of a mare,

其余事她会自己解决。

the rest would take care of itself.

当然，我当然知道

Surely, surely I knew that,

谁有木桶的力量

who had the power of bucket

和缰绳的蛮横——

and bridle—

她会恳求我，躲起来，

she would beseech me, sidle up,

离开。生命如此短暂啊，

be gone, as life is short.

但欲望，欲望久长。

But desire, desire is long.