My mare, when she was in heat,

我的母马，当她发情时，

would travel the fenceline for hours,

会在栅栏上行驶几个小时，

wearing the impatience

背负着不耐烦

in her feet into the ground.

用她的蹄子击穿地面。

Not a stallion for miles, I’d assure her,

我向她保证，不是几英里外的种马，

give it up.

这才罢休。

She’d widen her nostrils,

她会张大鼻孔，

sieve the wind for news, be moving again,

过滤着风寻找信息，然后再动，

her underbelly darkening with sweat,

她的下腹部因汗水而变黑，

then stop at the gate a moment, wait

然后在门口停一下，等一下

to see what I might do.

观察我预想做的事情。

Oh, I knew

哦，我知道

how it was for her, easily

对她来说这样子，很容易

recognized myself in that wide lust:

在那种广泛的欲望中认出自己：

came to stand in the pasture

来到牧场

just to see it played.

只是为了看它表现。

Offered a hand, a bucket of grain—

伸出一只手，一桶谷物——

a minute’s distraction from passion

一分钟后她就从激情中分心，出神

the most I gave.

因我的给予。

Then she’d return to what burned her:

然后她会回到烧伤她的地方：

the fence, the fence,

栅栏，栅栏，

so hoping I might see, might let her free.

所以我期待，如果可能，让她自由

I’d envy her then,

我羡慕她

to be so restlessly sure

如此焦躁地透支

of heat, and need, and what it takes

热量，渴望，以及需求

to feed the wanting that we are—

以满足我们的需求——

only a gap to open

只有一个缺口可以打开

the width of a mare,

母马的辽阔，

the rest would take care of itself.

其余事她会自己解决。

Surely, surely I knew that,

当然，我当然知道

who had the power of bucket

谁有木桶的力量

and bridle—

和缰绳的蛮横——

she would beseech me, sidle up,

她会恳求我，躲起来，

be gone, as life is short.

离开。生命如此短暂啊，

But desire, desire is long.

但欲望，欲望久长。